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dirkbot:

things they don’t show you in porn:

  • elbowing each other in the face
  • leg cramps
  • queefing
  • accidentally pulling each other’s hair
  • ass pubes

things they also don’t show in porn:

  • sleepy morning sex
  • mutual giggle fits over awkward situations
  • sex fading into cuddles fading into sex and back into cuddles
  • your lover’s o face

so don’t ever compare yourself to porn thank you

(via rosesandkittenkisses)





gotitforcheap:

you can pretty much peer pressure any australian male into doing something by saying “don’t be a shit cunt” 

(via rosesandkittenkisses)





gaydicks420:

last night i woke up because two dudes were fighting underneath my window and one dude kept screaming “BRO!! BRO YOU CALLED ME A BITCH IN FRONT OF THE WHOLE BAR BRO!! THE WHOLE BAR!! WHY WOULD YOU DO THAT BRO??” he sounded so heart broken. why bro. why did you do this.

(via rosesandkittenkisses)





liftedandgiftedd:

the-arena-ballerina:

neptunain:

christmas is so much worse as you get older it’s like “what do you want this year?” “a sense of purpose”

"a career" "financial security" "a sex life" "tuition for grad school" "alcohol" "a nap" "socks would be nice"

but why is this the most accurate thing I’ve ever read

(via rosesandkittenkisses)





dikubutto:

blackturtleneckcat:

it’s not rude to interrupt someone to point out a dog

It’s actually more polite because then they don’t miss out on a dog

(via runningrepubmain)